Proverbs 6:25
by antisaints
Summary: Nobody ever brags about going to Catholic School. NaruSasu YURI. AU. Requested by elveljung.


_**Proverbs 6:25**_

Being in a Catholic School wasn't somewhere you bragged about.

Not here, not ever.

They named it Keisei. Built in a small suburb that was technically on the outskirts of Osaka, but so on the outskirts that if the girls actually had time on their weekends to go to the city, they never could. Its students: a blended population of foreigners, young criminals, and those transitioning out of homeschool. Its purpose, engraved in a plaque next to the statue of its founding Headmistress, is to change girls into women. _Finishing school_, because by the time you were done, you were finished. Recycled into a sexist society, forever burned by what you experienced there. Keisei had no debate club, but required Home Economics courses. Had a population of 600 girls, about 500 of which were live-ins in the dormitories, along with a staff proportioned twenty-one women and four men.

Don't make the mistake of thinking the proportion is because of feminist pride. Men are too good to work on all girl's schools, you see. They only get stuck there if they're in the process of dealing with sexual harassment or statutory rape suits. Piece of shit men who have laughable teaching degrees but a relatively fair enough understanding of their material. And all women are good for is cooking, cleaning, and teaching basic requirements to young-women, obviously. The mentality, disgusting. Likelihood of reform: Zero.

Naruto, standing abnormally tall at 5'9" with a DD cup and blonde hair falling far past her ass, she was there because she had a Behavior Problem. Behavior Problem meant she'd been a yanki until whoever made her come to this bullshit place effectively ousted her from her gang. It was policy that if a biker bitch ever went to some fancy finishing school, she was finished. If the biker bitch in question tried to return to her group, they'd beat her into a coma with aluminum bats, unless she was hardcore enough to take them all. Naruto's Behavior Problem entailed that when she came to Keisei, all the other yanki would kick her ass. That was just standard. Like an admissions exam. Naruto was there because she ended up the hospital, Queen Motherfucking Kyuubi herself, with half a dozen broken limbs and the girl she'd been fighting in a drug-induced coma next to her. She was there because her fake-family didn't know how to deal with her, so they found the cheapest school to ship her off to, and ship her off they did.

Sasuke was there because she tried to fuck her boyfriend. _Try_ being the keyword, it was kind of pathetic. At her previous school, she'd been the perfect girl. The kind of girl people hate with an erroneous, acute passion for the sole purpose of existing. And of course, the people wouldn't show it. Unlike Naruto, she was short and had cute little B cups you couldn't see through the loose blouse of her uniform. Black hair that spiked messily, that only half hit her shoulders. Top of her class, obviously. If it had been America, she would have been prom queen, but it wasn't, so she wasn't. Perfect girls lead perfect lives with perfect, hotshot boyfriends. Hers had been Karin, who had been relatively unpopular until she dated him. Sasuke's mother had found a ring of contraceptive pills stowed away in her room and overreacted.

Nobody ever brags about being in Catholic School.

--

Three years. That was how long High School lasted in Japan, then there was University, and then, life. Naruto didn't move in until the middle of the first grading term, and until then, Sasuke had been doing wonderfully. Her schedule was hyper-demanding, but it also meant very small classes with people she would eventually know very well. With the school population being mostly yanki and illiterate, religious foreigners, AP classes usually only had ten students, perhaps less, and Sasuke's schedule read AP Calculus, AP Physics, Honors Japanese 2, Child Development, AP Bible History 2, AP English as a Foreign Language 2, Lifetime Wellness, and Honors Asian History. Eight classes, bounced around throughout the week so only four were taken per day, and she only hated two.

Keisei had a rather advanced Home Economics program. They offered Child Development 1 and 2, which was essentially Sex Ed during the first term and how to raise a baby during the second term. They offered Interior Design, which was _not_ about real design, it was about how to decorate. Two How-to-Cook-for-your-Husband classes. One course simply entitled "Housing", which was _literally_ a class on how to clean. Teaching as a Profession, because that was the only profession a woman could apparently do. Two "Textiles and Apparels" classes, and by that they meant sewing. A flower arrangement class. A cosmetology class. It was their largest non-core department, and the gender-stereotyping of it all made her sick. Made her more sick than most of the yanki, with all of their rage and tomboyishness and aluminum _bats_, ever vocalized. That, and she hated Wellness, which was _also_ Sex Ed (courtesy of her parents, she was sure) mixed in with PE.

But regardless of whether she hated them or not, she'd been doing wonderfully in each until Naruto moved in.

Sasuke was sitting at her desk, typing at one of the very few personal computers any student owned (and, for the record, she'd kept a quiet secret so it wasn't stolen) when the doorknob of her dorm room rattled for a moment before a heaneous noise erupted from it so heavily that it rattled off its hinges, and a voice that had almost _no_ feminine qualities to it at _all_ screamed out "OI, OPEN THE DOOR, DATTEBAYO."

A few days ago, she'd received a notice from the school in the mailbox she rented she would soon have a roommate. But Sasuke only ever got the mail when it was so overfilled with letters and packages from home that the mailman had to carry it all up to her room, something he didn't _appear_ to hate doing by the way he stared when she opened the door. A stare that she didn't see too often, since - despite how masculine the yanki were - all of them seemed to be straight and all of them seemed to have an immense, unbearable hatred for all things _girly_. And Sasuke was _girly_. She pushed her glasses up to her nose, frowning deeply at the noise and shutting her laptop, crossing the room where the door was still chain-bolted and opening it just a crack.

She had to look up to see a face. Tanned dark and blue eyes in a permanent glare, blonde hair _everywhere_ but too natural to _be_ natural. Three scars per cheek, and teeth clenched with irritation, though she barely had the time to actually take in any of this appearance before that voice was yelling _again_, godfucking- "ARE YOU DEAF." She cringed, involuntarily stepping back, not out of fear - she'd gotten her ass kicked here once or twice, sure, but she wasn't _afraid_ of anyone whose future obviously entailed premarital pregnancy and a drug addiction - but because of the noise. The dorm's insulation just seemed to make her louder, and the brunette's head throbbed as she groaned a dark, "No, I am not deaf. What the hell do you want."

For half a second, her company seemed a bit taken aback. "... WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHAT THE HELL DO I WANT. I _LIVE HERE_."

"God, will you _stop screaming_."

"I'm not screaming, you're screaming."

She was missing a tooth from the back of her jaw, and her front teeth looked like they'd been worked on _badly_. Japan had terrible dentistry and even worse orthodontistry. Sasuke kept from staring and instead opted for _glaring_ when the blonde let out an agitated scoff, digging something out of her jean pockets (the last time, as it were, she would be wearing pants on campus) and pushed a half torn letter through the small crack that let her see what little of her new home she _could_ see. Sasuke snatched it, skull throbbing with a developing headache, and let her eyes run over it.

Room assignment:

Saint Agatha Hall, R: 191, Roommate: Uchiha Sasuke.

The color drained out of her face, and the sound like a gunshot made her head snap up with the chain broke too easily and sent Naruto (who'd used her body to smash into it like they did in those cop movies) _flying_ inside, the force she'd used far too much for a door that hadn't been replaced in almost 100 years, and Sasuke felt pain from all sides before she could even _blink_ as she smashed into the floor, Naruto smashing into her, dizziness making her nauseated and world reeling just long enough for her to realize _what_?

That she'd kissed a fucking girl.

"This is Uzumaki Naruto. She just transferred all the way from Amagasaki."

Amagasaki. Instant street cred. A city filled with yanki and yakuza. They didn't call her Kyuubi because, technically speaking, that wasn't her name. But she wore her Kamikaze coat everywhere, bright red and earning her a detention she never went to every time she passed the hall monitor, had the Kanji for 9 in flaming gold embroidery, and there weren't a lot of people who didn't know what that meant. Unfortunately, with her kneesocks pulled off and her blouse bursting at the buttons, skirt barely hanging down past her waist and all over just looking so damn _gorgeous_ it hurt to watch for too long - Naruto got her ass kicked on her first day of class. Granted, it had taken a group of six to take her down, but she'd returned to her dorm with a black eye and her uniform stained with blood.

Sasuke hadn't been there to pretend to be sympathetic.

First week was Hell Week. Yanki weren't the most creative, so they took the name from the American collegiate Greek system, the week of hazing before one can join a fraternity. Same principle, only Naruto wasn't joining a gang. If it took six to take down one, you _were_ a gang. Comparitively speaking, for Naruto, Hell Week had been more like purgatory week. It hadn't been nearly as bad as the shit that went down on any given day in Amagasaki, anyway. For girls like Sasuke, whose defensive skills went only as far as a couple years of Judo (useless when your opposition has blunt force weapons), Hell Week could send you to the ER. The only people who seemed to be exempt were the white foreign girls that the yanki wanted to absorb.

For the most part, she'd been able to lick her own wounds. For deep cuts, the school nurse gave her stitches. But even so, all the dirty fighting and conflict was actually improving her mood. As a person, she was inherently good. As the Kyuubi persona, she wasn't. And she'd made up her mind in her first week that she wasn't going to join a gang at fucking _Catholic school_ because that would _destroy_ her rep back home.

--

On Sundays, they went to mass. They being the entire school, except for all the yanki that skipped in the name of religious oppression or needing to smoke. Naruto was like that, and Sasuke wasn't. As a general rule, "Naruto was like that, and Sasuke wasn't." was something that could be applied to _everything_. Naruto stayed up _far_ too late, dancing to metal records, talking to her friends from home, stitching up her Kamikaze coat, using the thin plaster walls as makeshift punching bags, smoking cigarettes to the point where the fire detectors would go off, and - all around - being as sincerely irritating as possible. Sasuke, on the otherhand, went to bed at ten. Cleaned up after herself, preferred texting Suigetsu, Karin, and Juugo because it was quieter, stayed at her desk for long periods of time doing homework, always used an iPod with headphones instead of a boom box, and - generally speaking - would have been a very respectful roommate for any _normal_ person.

Sasuke hated Naruto. Naruto hated Sasuke.

On Sundays, Sasuke went to mass because that was what you were supposed to do. The rules of Keisei stated that students were to wear their uniforms everywhere if they were leaving their rooms, however on Sundays, if they had an approved outfit for mass, they could wear that. Sasuke wore the same dress she wore to funerals, and sometimes, she would even pray, despite herself not believing in the Catholic concept of a God. Sometimes, she went to confessional, because girls who went to confessional were girls who might graduate early. Or inherit more rights. The only people who were considered in better standing than herself were the girls who were in the Leadership courses.

Leadership was a class where students organized school events. For example, every year, there was a dance with the boys from the other Catholic school. They organized that. They sold cookies to raise money for the senior fund, so the senior committee could give a gift to the school, as if they owed them more than all of the tuition they'd paid. They organized field trips and had food drives for the underprivileged, that sort of thing. The closest thing Sasuke did to that was Peer Tutoring, when - after dinner - she would go to the library with the other tutors and wait for someone to come to her and ask for help. Which usually meant, Sasuke going to the library and doing her homework there because too many of the yanki had beat her up to be able to ask for her help, and the foreigners were afraid of her. The yanki were terrifying in a conventional way, loud and angry and always two seconds from going off.

Sasuke was scary for an entirely different reason.

--

"How are you transitioning?"

Naruto's legs weren't crossed - they _never_ were - to the point where her counselor could see straight up her skirt should he have been inclined, but he didn't seem to be. His name was Kakashi, and he looked like he could care more about a grain of rice than how she was transitioning. But the fact was, Naruto was transitioning relatively well. "Fine...?" Regardless, she was yanki. She was blonde hair and big boobs and could kick anyone's ass, _believe it_. So she didn't know how to talk to authority at all, and was _really_ trying to figure out if a school shrink was considered authority.

"Tell me about your first couple of weeks. Your friends."

"... uh. My first week sucked. I had to get my new teeth made and I had to play catch up for all these crappy classes and OMIGOD why the _hell_ is it necessary I take _Bible History_-" Kakashi opened his mouth to answer her, not looking up from his book, but she didn't stop for a second. "-And I don't even know what to do with the whole. CD. Thing." CD, for the record, did not stand for compact disc. It stood for Child Development, and was the only class she shared with her snobby roommate. "Seriously, they're all. 'Oh, this is how a baby is made'. And there are people who are _legit_ hearing this for the first time. It's kind of terrifying, I shit you not. What elseeee."

"Your classes."

"SURE, yeah. Classes. I've got Algebra, and Japanese 2, and Theatre 2, and uhhhh." She held up her fingers, counting off the other five. "Ecology. English 1, Bible, PE, and CD. Algebra, Japanese, Ecology, and English totally blow. Ecology blows the least because our teacher is this weirdo treehugger who plays Whale music while we take notes, but basically, all my cores are pretty godawful. Theatre could be cool if all the people didn't want to be main female lead. Cuz like, it's an all chick school, so obviously, people are going to have to play boys, but nobody ever wants to but me, and my teacher says I can't because I sing soprano but I definitely _don't_ single soprano, I think she's just saying it because my boobs are big which is _not my fault_, LE-GIT."

Good God could Naruto talk when she was in a good mood. "I already told you about CD, which is just weird. My roomie, Sasuke, she's in that class. Good _lord_ she is such a_ bastard_, I swear. And yeah, she's a bastard, not a bitch. Bitches get some. She's such a snob. Apparently her parents are super rich or something so every time I open our mailbox it's all presents and money and stuff, and every time I try to talk to her, she's all ME AND MY SMALL BOOBS ARE GOING TO SCOFF AT YOU and just. No. Not even cool. But other than her, my friends _rocckkkkk_. No lie. There's uh. There's Shika and Chouji and Lee and Neji and Gaara and Shino and Kiba and Sai and Konohamaru who keeps following me around and allllll the other people who rock too. Chouji's on this diet though, it's making her a huge bitch. And Sai's obsessed with cock. Like, all day, penis. She's so supressed here, I think she's gonna go fucking _crazy_."

Even that didn't get Kakashi's attention. The blonde let out a sigh. "ALSO, ME AND MY DOUBLE D's WOULD LIKE TO RIDE YOU."

Not true, but.

"... _what_?"

"Nothing. Can I go?"

"... yeah. Sure."

Sasuke's visits with Kakashi were always monumentally less engaging. It would start with a dull "You told me to be here at _eight_, why were _you_ late?!" followed by a bullshit excuse, and then Kakashi would ask her questions that Sasuke would answer with one word. Part of going to Keisei meant you were a problem, and part of being a problem meant they had to supply a solution. Girls A-M's solution was Asuma. Girls N-Z were in Kakashi's caseload. At least, that was the case for their year. There were a total of 6 counselors in the school, and they were recycled every time their caseload graduated. So Kakashi would ask.

"Do you miss your family?"

And Sasuke would shrug and shake her head.

Kakashi would ask, "Are you still in contact with your boyfriend?"

Sasuke would lie and shake her head.

Kakashi would ask how she was doing in her classes as if he didn't already know, and Sasuke would tell him she was doing fine. Doing fine meant she was the top of her class, contributing to her heavily inflated ego and her chosen path of severe isolation. After all, Sasuke was better than them and she knew it. For all the reasons she had to distance herself from her peers, the one that dominated most was the most irrational and highbrow. Every time a report card was handed out, a list of students with a 3.5 GPA or better was posted, along with the class ranks. For her, always #1. And every time the closest #2 would underrank her by a full grade point, she'd isolate further. Because Sasuke didn't like stupid people _ever_.

Kakashi would ask about her sister, about her roommate, about her emotional state, and when he would get sick of her painfully dull responses, he would send her on her way.

--

"Can you stop that?"

Sasuke's conversational skills were nill, and so the sound of her voice nearly made the blonde jump out of her skin, cigarette dropping from her mouth onto the linoleum floor.

"Wha- _why_."

"Because. A. It's very, very bad for you. It causes incredibly painful tumors in the lungs that result in death, and if it doesn't do that, will cause emphysema or Heart disease. B. It's very, very bad for me, and it would be humiliating for me to get lung cancer from _your_ cigarettes. C. The smell gives me a headache and makes it impossible to study. D. The smoke detector is blinking and if you set off another fire alarm, I _swear_."

Naruto grinned, crushing the fag into the floor and flopping onto Sasuke's bed, watching her back. "Temeeee, I swear, that's the most I've heard you say _ever_."

The brunette only grunted in reply.

"Why are you like that?"

No response.

"'Cuz I mean. I know that deep down inside somewhere, you're probably not a totally frigid bitch that nobody likes "

"Which is more than one could say for you."

"...what- HEY."

--

Naruto had been there for four weeks when her first piece of mail finally showed up. Everything up until then had been for Sasuke, and most of it, she just threw away. If it looked like money or tomatoes - she had this weird thing about tomatoes - she'd open it, but everything else went to the trash. Which Naruto would then exhume and open herself, and if the contents were good, she'd keep it. Her first piece of mail was a package sent directly from a manufacturer, and when she'd signed for, initially, she thought it was some kind of a mistake. After all, the thing came all the way up to her waist, was about three feet in width, but weighed about nothing. When she tore into it, however, the delighted scream that emitted from her startled everything in a 30 mile radius, because inside, tightly packed and in very neat rows, were about 500 packages of cup ramen.

When her mom didn't suck, good _God_ she rocked.

(Obviously.)

When Sasuke had returned to find the giant box now sitting in the middle of their dorm, the look of disgust that slowly bled over her features made Naruto laugh so hard that a mouthful of broth and a few half-chewed noodles spray out of her nose, succeeding in disgusting Sasuke to the point where she turned right back around and left.

This, in Naruto's book, was collectively one of the best days in human _history_.

--

Grounding was the only punishment anyone could actually serve at Keisei. Giving a yanki detention was like telling a bear not to shit in the woods. It went in one ear and straight out the other because bears don't understand human languages, and then you probably get eaten because you're fucking around with a godless killing machine. You couldn't _suspend_ a live-in with a family that lived far away because, most of the time, they wouldn't even have a way to get home. Trying to put them on janitorial duty was bullshit; they either wouldn't show up or they'd bully a nonyanki to go in their place. But grounding them, that stung. Getting off campus and into town was nearly impossible without going through the main gates, since the area was fenced in with metal bars that breeched 20 feet in height. In the rare occasion they _did_ hop fence, or find another way off-campus, it was even more difficult to get back in undetected, and no visits to town could drive a nonconformist crazy.

It was a cruel and unusual punishment.

"Psst, _Sasukeeeee_."

"Leave me alone."

Naruto grinned, crossing her arms and all 32 of her perfectly straight teeth glinting in the near dark. "You're such a buzzkill, g'damn."

Classes at Keisei were spread all over the small campus. It was a new experience to have to walk from room to room instead of having the teachers circulate, but most of the students liked it. Getting the fresh air occasionally, the change of scenery. Sasuke _hated_ it. In a place where it was impossible to skip class because most people _lived_ at school, her peers always found a way. There were rumors that there was an entire maze above their heads that the janitors used, since the building was so old. Sasuke didn't believe it; the architecture of the building simply didn't allow for that kind of complexity above _or_ below it, but the few times she'd actually tried to explain it, a yanki had nearly spit in her face.

Which, in hindsight, would have been better than what they did to her when she managed to rather deftly avoid it.

"What do you want?"

They were watching a propaganda film about abstinence. They watched a _lot_ of those, if one were perfectly frank, all the bullshit about saving yourself for marriage was apparently very deeply integrated into the Christian faith. Sasuke had been raised Shinto, and Naruto was an atheist, but they both were required to go to mass every Sunday and had required Bible classes. Required meaning, if they flunked them, supposedly they would be kicked out, but neither had ever heard of anyone actually getting removed because of it. And plenty of girls did fail. "Lemme copy your math."

"No."

"But Sasuke, that's not-!"

"_Oi_." Teacher. Substitute teacher. She hadn't even noticed. "Do you two have something you'd like to share with the rest of the class?"

Sasuke knew what was coming before the thought even conjured in Naruto's mind, and she sighed, putting her head down as the blonde yelled "I'D LIKE TO SHARE MY FOOT WITH YOUR _COLON_, DETTABAYO."

This was the first time Naruto got grounded.

--

"How come you're leaving the _one_ weekend I'm stuck here, datteba_yo_?"

Naruto's bottom lip was jetting out with her whine as Sasuke slipped into her blazer. "Because I detest you and I need some perfume."

The blonde blinked. For someone as horrifically narcissistic as her roommate, Sasuke went incredibly natural. She never wore any makeup, didn't straighten or curl her hair, only very occasionally wore nailpolish of any sort, never stuffed her chest when coming into contact with something of the male species (something that was a right of passage at an all girl's school), didn't have pierced ears, didn't wear foundation, and, now that she thought of it. She'd never even seen Sasuke use deodorant. She probably _did_, but Naruto'd never seen a speedstick in their bathroom. The only things on Sasuke's side of the sink was a hairbrush (a fancy one, though!), a toothbrush and tube of toothpaste, a black razor and small can of shaving cream, and a bar of soap. "... the hell do you need perfume for? You smell fine!"

The brunette blinked.

"_I_ don't need perfume. This room constantly smells like ramen, I can't stand it any longer."

Naruto's mouth opened to retort, but the door was already shut with a snap.

"... YEAH WELL. LEAST I'M NOT ANOREXIC."

--

Japanese schools worked off a trimester system. The first trimester ran from April to mid-July, followed by a month of summer break. The second trimester ran from September to late December, followed by a short winter break. Longer at Keisei because it adhered to both Christian and Buddhist holidays. Third trimester ran from early January to March, followed by a two or three week Spring Break. The idea was that if you never kept students out of class longer than four weeks, they'd do better in class. For the most part, they were right. At a school with an average GPA of only 1.3, it wouldn't have made a difference either way.

"... well uh."

"Goodbye."

"Are you seriously staying here, dattebayo?"

"For the last time: I am staying here."

"Sasuke, _why_."

"Because I detest my family, we've been _over this_."

"So why don't you just come with me?!"

"Because I don't want to go to Amagasaki and get shot."

"You won't get shot!"

"Raped and murdered, then."

".... you probably won't get raped or murdered!"

"Bye, Naruto."

"...bye."

--

It was a few weeks into their second term, all the girls who'd returned back with beautiful tans and Sasuke looking an unhealthy pale by comparison, that Naruto had an epiphany. See, Sasuke, who was a complete bitch when she met her, had slowly stopped being that much of a bitch. But in had taken someone to point out that Sasuke hadn't changed her behavior at _all_. She was still antisocial as hell, would still blow her off if she was bleeding out six pints of blood, still didn't care about Naruto's grades and wouldn't help her unless she came to Peer Tutoring, _still_ wouldn't speak unless addressed first, and, generally speaking, was a hugely unattractive person. But somehow, Naruto had tricked herself into thinking Sasuke was getting nicer.

Truth was, there was no fucking way. She also came to the epiphany that she was thinking about Sasuke way too much, and it was seriously killing her brainspace. Example, when her roomie wasn't around, that was all that was on the brain. I wonder what _Sasuke_'_s_ doing, even though it was incredibly obvious what Sasuke was likely doing. Studying or talking to her stupid piece of cock. And yeah, that was another thing. Naruto had gotten insanely irritated when she'd seen Sasuke smile a little at some text at 10 in the evening, so irritated - in fact - she'd grabbed the phone and smashed it with all of the force she had in her body. And nothing about that poor phone was salvaged. Sasuke had just _gaped_ at her for a moment before erupting into furious WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU, WHY DID YOU _DO_ THAT's to which Naruto retorted a whole lot of does-not-follow fallacies like YOU MAKE TOO MUCH NOISE, PHONES GIVE YOU CANCER, YOU FUCKING SUCK, GO DIE IN A FIRE which only proved to make Sasuke _that much angrier_ to the point that she punched the blonde in the face, which really didn't mean much since Sasuke hit like a girl and Naruto hit her back like a man.

Which led to another thing. She had felt so _bad_ after that. In their history together, Naruto had hit Sasuke and Sasuke had hit Naruto about 1000 times. Guesttimation, but still. Probably right. Sasuke couldn't punch because she tried to punch like they did in movies, but she could get a lot of force behind her elbows or the sides of her fists, and that hurt like _hell_. And of course, Naruto knew how to fight. When Sasuke would come to class with black eyes, she would somehow get a little more respect, even though it was obvious she lost, _just_ for having the balls to fight probably the strongest bitch in the school. Queen Motherfucking Kyuubi herself. But - for _whatever_ reason - Naruto had regretted that hit so much that she didn't look at her roommate for nearly a week and a half, until the swelling on her cheek dulled into a sick brown-green that could almost be ignored.

Yeah, her relationship with Sasuke? Good _lord_ it was getting complicated. When Sasuke wouldn't eat enough, because she had to run off to her next class but _hated_ eating and walking at the same time, Naruto would get all bitchy about it and bring her food. If anyone _but_ her called Sasuke anorexic, however, they'd get beaten within an inch of their lives, no matter how much Naruto liked them. Anorexic was a term only _she_ could say. Actually, now that she thought about it. When anyone talked to Sasuke for any lengthy amount of time, it'd piss her off the way she did with the boyfriend in the telephone. After all, the brat _was_ her best friend, just hers.

Right?

--

Sasuke smoothed out the plaid material of her skirt, legs crossed and her expression dull. Across from her, Kakashi. Once every two months or so, she had to talk to him for ten minutes, then she could leave and he could call for Naruto. It was an alphabetical rotation, so it was always her next. When she'd stepped inside, the man hadn't bothered looking up from his book, some smutty sexist crap nobody should be reading in an Catholic school, but she didn't say anything. She couldn't pretend to care if Kakashi was a sexist or not, because everybody was. That was Japan, that was life. Women had a specific role to fill, and everything outside of that role was irrelevant. Japan was actually an underpopulated society, most parents having only one child or less, which meant that they were dropping far below the replacement level with too many old people to take care of. Even fewer jobs were being offered to women in hopes that they would spend more time getting knocked up and raising children.

But it wasn't likely. It cost more money to raise a child in Japan than in almost any other country.

"Are you going to ask me anything?"

Her voice, quiet and cold, after five minutes of silence.

Kakashi shook his head. "You never talk anyway, so I thought you could just come inside and sit here for fifteen minutes and then you could leave."

Her eyes narrowed slightly, suspicious of him and the prospect of reverse psychology, but retrieved a book from her purse and flipped it open. Another five minutes passed, her eyes glued to the elegant script on each page that ran right to left and vertically, before she looked up at him curiously. He was still reading his book, chin resting lazily against his fist and elbow propped up against the table, and her teeth ground involuntarily together.

"Something you wish to discuss?"

She snarled and shook her head, glaring back at her book and uncrossing her legs, opting to lock them at the ankles instead.

"Alright, then."

Goddamnit he was annoying. In retrospect, she wasn't missing boys. She wasn't missing Karin. He'd been really, _really_ obsessed with her, and all he'd done was suit her needs. She'd never felt that physically attracted to him (she hated redheads), but knew that teenagers were supposed to have sex after a year of dating, so she got birth control pills. Only managed to take three before getting caught. She didn't really miss Suigetsu, either, she'd been more attracted to Karin than she'd ever been, and was probably riding him now. Sasuke didn't see why not. Juugo was the only one she'd opt to see if she returned home, but she couldn't imagine the next time she would. Her new cell (which she'd had to go to town to buy) didn't have any of their numbers, and Juugo'd been the only one to contact her first since Naruto had saw fit to smash it.

She glared at the floor, crossing her arms.

"I'm breaking up with my boyfriend."

Kakashi looked up and smiled.

"Let's talk about that, then."

--

Near the end of September, summer began to draw to a close in lieu of the frigid winter soon to follow. Summer uniforms packed up and mailed home and boxes of winter uniforms coming in all the time, that was how it worked. The winter uniform was revealing as well, but the skirt was slightly longer, wearing shorts beneath it was permitted, a tight jacket is involved, and the socks are far thicker. As if begging for another thing for them to argue about, Naruto hated winter. Sasuke loved it. She hated having her skin exposed, which was a necessity to survive the humid Japanese summers, hated sunburns and the way her scalp felt on fire if she stayed in the heat too long. Hated the feel of sweat, hated when her hair would plaster to her forehead, fucking _hated it_. But Naruto loved all of that. Loved pulling on a sports bra and boxing shorts and running around the track until she had enough moisture on her body to quench the thirst of several third world countries. Loved heat, the freedom that came with wearing less rather than more, and _detested_ the extra weight that came with heavy coats. Hated how everybody always got sick in winter _but_ her, hated how hot drinks replaced cold drinks and you suddenly couldn't find a slurpee anywhere.

The blonde grinned and threw her arms around the other girl's narrow shoulders, chest crushing to Sasuke's back and nearly causing her to lose her balance. "Suits your personality, Sasukeee "

"Get off me, fatass."

"Least mine's not bony."

"Mine _isn't_ bony."

"OH GOD SASUKE SURPRISE PARAPLEGIA."

"DAMNIT GET OFF- _OW_."

"I LOOOOVEEE YOUUUUU~ "

"GET _OFF_."

"MY _PLEASURE_~"

Of course, it was entirely Sasuke's fault she didn't read into this what she should have. After all, Naruto was her best friend.

--

Sasuke was quiet, jacket buttoned up to her throat and kneesocks as high up her legs as they could _get_, as they walked through town. Town wasn't Osaka, it was a small little knockoff place that suited the basic necessities of the students, and most importantly, had a hotel. Hotel meant the slutty yanki could leave school every weekend and fuck their boyfriends. The same way Sasuke could have, had she been inclined, but she didn't want children, and wasn't going to risk it. For Naruto, town meant the ability to buy more ramen (because she actually _did_ eat her way through 500 cups without gaining any weight), get more chick supplies, and bug the hell out of Sasuke when she went to the public library.

"Why are you even going, we _live_ in a school, dattebayo!"

The brunette snorted dryly, tightening the material around herself as someone catcalled at them - an occurrence common enough when she went alone but _impossible_ to avoid when Naruto and her inflated breasts had to follow her. "Because, you illiterate fool, the books in the school library do not include any risque content because of the Catholic belief system. And no risque content means no good books." They'd even banned the Harry Potter series. Not that she actually would want to read that at her age, but the _concept_ of banning children's books because supposedly Christ was going to be offended? Christ was not going to be offended. He died horribly on a cross with nine inch spikes driven through his hands and feet, left to rot in the sun. If he's such an impressive god, Sasuke was sure he had more to worry about than Harry and his little wizard friends. For example, _Africa_.

Naruto giggled, hands buried lazily in her pockets. Unlike Sasuke, she was _very_ liberal when it came to her uniform. If it was four degrees C outside, like hell was she just gonna wear a skirt. Try more like. Uniform + scarves, hats, gloves, a pair of thick pants underneath her skirt, two or three pairs of socks, and anything else insulating she could come up with. "I didn't take you to be into smutty books."

"It's not _smutty_, risque means any book that has a curse word or a sexual innuendo. I.E., nearly every book written in the past two hundred years."

"... so. Smutty."

"No."

"You should just get laid."

"You are likely correct, but since I don't see anyone in a 500 feet radius I would like to lose my virginity to, _asshole_, I think I will start with _reading_."

"... CAN WE GET RAMEN LATER."

"God, you are disgustingly ADD."

--

There were only a couple weeks left until the winter break, where Sasuke actually _was_ planning on going home. Planning on going home and selling the idea of transferring back home, she'd told her roommate angrily. Her well-implemented plan of isolating the hell out of her family (Naruto had been disturbed to learn Sasuke never answered the phone when her mother, father, or sister called, nor did she ever call them herself, nor did she ever reply to any of their letters or send packages) - that they would, assuming any of them had a soul, let her come home and resume regular schooling. She'd slowly begun reorganizing her things, so that the night before she left she'd be able to easily pack everything together, but regardless, there were still three or so weeks of chilled December left before she could even try.

And so, one evening, completely out of the blue, Naruto had sat up on her bed, staring at Sasuke intently, and said: "Oi, let me see your tits."

And Sasuke, one of the most articulate people she had ever met, who had been sitting in her bed reading via booklight, sputtered awkwardly and hissed - "..._what_?"

"Lemme see 'em!"

The brunette glared, rolling onto her stomach. "Hell no. Go look at your own, they're mine times six." Naruto had grown to be a hyper affectionate, touchy-feely-as-hell person, and Sasuke had taken it to be the norm. Shrugged her off most of the time, but didn't _really_ freak out because she never did anything obscene. However, the way the conversation was going, she wasn't about to take any chances. "I don't wanna look at mine, I wanna look at yours!" Naruto crossed her arms brattily, her pigtails getting so long she was having a hard time not getting them snagged on something everywhere she went. "Go look at _Sai's_, then, I have no doubt she'd be delighted."

"Stupid _teme_, what did I _say_."

Naruto scrambled with a disturbing sort of speed onto Sasuke's bed with her, knocking her to the side so they both fit and grinning dazzlingly. "Leave me alone, you freak."

"Sas_ukeeeee_."

"Stupid _dobe_, what did I _say_."

"Sas_ukeeeeeeeee_."

She opened her mouth to speak and groaned in discomfort as her center of balance threw off completely, booklight falling to the floor and the otherwise total darkness allowing only for what she registered with her other four senses. Naruto's deadweight on her hips and her hands hard on her shoulders, hard enough to bruise because Naruto didn't know her own strength and Sasuke was too proud to admit the blonde could _ever_ hurt her. "And now you can't see them, the light is on the-" and she _shrieked_ in indignation as a crushing force hit her mouth, as Naruto's nose pressed into her cheek and her tongue traced over her mouth and the hands on her shoulders secured her back.

" I bet you look like a cat tossed in a river right about now."

"... WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT."

Sasuke turned her head sharply when Naruto tried to kiss her again, so she only met the skin of her cheek, but she kissed across it unfamiliar but curious, giggling triumphantly. "I'm not into you like that will you _get off_."

"No. Make out with me."

"... _pass_."

Naruto's ears seemed to flatten visibly and she whined, sliding off her hips so she could at least _move_ but yanking her up into a seated position, winding her arms around her neck and nosing her face affectionately. "Come on. I love you. I seriously love you. I wanna punch you _all_ the time, but I love you." She nudged the brunette's face up slightly and kissed her firm but not _hard_, locking her close but not as invading as the first. Sasuke was dead still in her arms, heart beating so fast it sounded like a timebomb about to go off, her only movement occasionally jumping when the blonde would nip and suck at her lips or her jaw, until she finally said, dumbly: "You're not gay."

"Mm, so what~?"

The night before Sasuke left to go home, Naruto left so many hickies over every _inch_ of her body that there was no way in _hell_ her parents were letting her transfer.

After all, Naruto always brags about going to Catholic School.

_fin._

A/N: Uwaaa. I'm not proud of this Dx Two numbers won my BD contest, 191 and 199 (I'm obsessed with 1's and 9's, if you couldn't tell) and this was my 191 winner, elveljung. She asked for genderswitch NaruSasu. I had a horrible time coming up with something to write, and when I did, I had an equally horrid time executing it. I'm sorry =A= This is a oneshot, so it's complete. If you liked this, you're crazyyyy because it totally sucks 8(


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